me: KNIIIIIIAAAIIIIFE RELAAAAYYYYTEED CRYAIIIMEESSSSS

I genuinely thought this was Julia Louis-Dreyfuss till the reveal wtf

[me wearing odd socks and a bra I am 99% sure doesn’t *quite* fit me to work under my NHS uniform that thank fuck I have to wear because I cannot be trusted to choose a different outfit every morning]: fuck him UP, DEREK

my bf last night: I have to be up early tomorrow morning so don’t worry about being quiet while you’re getting ready for work ok

me right now:

Me after my date gets up to leave 10 minutes into Netflix & chill:

ACAB apart from this one because he made me lol

deputy to

my gran would have loved this and I swear that’s a compliment

“now write something that’s going to make the right-wing unsure as to whether they’re massively angry about the UK being marked ‘unsafe’ then or ‘safe’ now”

New op ed for Metro

metro.co.uk/2024/04/30/lau…

Max Schreck just having a wee breather chill out as Nosferatu in 1922

I can’t find it now either on here or by searching on the big wide web to give proper credit but there’s a tweet that is something like

‘[points at baby] hey, your potato just barked at me’

and every now and then I think about it and holler

patient just checked in for a nurse’s appt and then from across another surgery’s waiting room from someone who clearly knew her was just *yelled*

“IS THAT FOR STDs HEN???”
“AYE PAL, AV GOT HUNNERS AW ‘EM!!”

and I’m really going to miss Glasgow

shark just swallowed a British floater