A landmark bill introduced by the Conservatives today will declare the climate as safe.

This is exciting news for BP and the new Cumbrian coal mine operators.

Deceased former RefluxUK candidate has been ordered back to work.

Now that the nuclear deterrent has been proven not to deter, do we still need to spend billions on it?

The unfit to govern in pursuit of the unfit to work.

The ‘Miracle Bill’ will have its final reading in the House today, declaring all sick people healthy, before it proceeds to the Lords to be kicked out.

#Sicknote

BREAKING: Infosys is to set up a specialist sick note processing division.

‘What do you mean you want a miracle to restore your eyesight? Get back to work, you slacker.’

- Jesus Christ, 2,000 years ago

So glad to hear that Rishi Sunak has a better understanding of my mental health than either me or my shrink

Johnson made parliament irrelevant. Sunak is just carrying on the tradition.

Oh no, not another scandal. Time to give the sick another kicking.

Bamford donates his company diggers to the Tories with instruction to dig up any dirt & dead bodies they can on The Labour Party

& to bury their own as deep as possible

#MenziesGate

Citizen Paul Templeman (Betamax Male) 🇪🇺 #FBPE Mary 🧡🇬🇧🇪🇺🇧🇴😷💉x5 A very British summer.

The US has vetoed a Palestinian request for full UN membership.

It’s not like they were applying to join NATO!!

It tells you all you need to know about American policy in the Middle East and it’s allegiance with Israel no matter what.

I only found out today that the Menzies hostage scenario was brought to the attention of the Chief Whip in December but it was only when The Times broke the story that action was taken.

#MenziesGate

Out of 42K likes for this tweet a handful say it’s worse living in France. The tweet wasn’t really about France specifically BUT what I would say to the French is this:

When you’ve never had it so good you don’t realise you’ve got it so good!